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Last month we broke off just as Prisca
declared to Professor Theophilus that having
escaped from her pseudo-Christian cult, she
wanted nothing more to do with Jesus
Christ:
The wariness around Prisca's eyes turned
into anger. "I
think the whole Christian religion is a cult.
Don't you see
it? 'Cult' is just a name for someone else's
religion. Sarah
says 'Jesus' makes her religion different, but
The Group talks
about 'Jesus' too. If it hadn't been for Sarah I
might never
have listened to their 'Jesus' talk. It was
'Jesus' who took
away my family, 'Jesus' who took away my
friends, 'Jesus' who
made me beg strangers for money, 'Jesus'
who put me on the Shun
List, and 'Jesus' who gave me only four
hours of sleep a night."
Facing me, she declared in dark tones, "I've
had enough
'Jesus,' Professor."
We now resume Prisca’s story:
I thought for a little while before I gave her my
reply. Her
eyes were fixed on me. Secretly I asked God
for insight.
"Prisca, could it be that you're talking about
"another
Jesus"?
It's difficult for anyone to be altogether angry
and
altogether puzzled at the same time. Her
anger receded by a few
millimeters as she warily considered my
question.
"What do you mean?"
"Would you read something for me?"
She was still suspicious, but now even more
perplexed. "Out
loud?"
"If you don't mind. That way you can be sure
I'm not
deceiving you."
"I suppose. Do you mean something from
the Bible?"
"Yes, from Paul's second letter to the
Corinthians. Begin
reading here in chapter 11, if you don't mind." I
handed her
the book.
"Which verses?"
"Just start with number three."
Stiffly, Prisca began to read. "But I am
afraid that just as
Eve was deceived by the serpent's cunning,
your minds may somehow be
led astray from your sincere and pure devotion
to Christ. For if
someone comes to you and preaches a
Jesus other than the Jesus we
preached" — she glanced up at me, then
continued — "or if you
receive a different spirit from the one you
received, or a different
Gospel from the one you accepted, you put up
with it easily
enough."
She paused. "Is Paul complaining because
these Corinthians
had been taken in by a cult?"
"Something like that," I said. "When he
explained the Gospel
to them, they received it gladly. But they were
very new in the
faith, and they bent this way and that according
to what they heard
from other would-be teachers. Take a look at
what he says in the
next verse."
"But I do not think I am in the least inferior
to those
'super-apostles,'" she read. Instead of
looking up, she continued
to study the page. Then with a short, wry
laugh, she faced me. She
was almost smiling. I had rarely known
anyone whose moods changed
so rapidly.
"So you think I was led astray by
'super-apostles,' do you,
Professor Theophilus?"
"What do you think, Prisca? Did The Group
teach the same
Gospel that you heard from Sarah and found
in the Bible?"
"No. They said Jesus wasn't God and Man
but a man who
became God, and that by doing the
right things, we could all
become God, too. As for the Bible, they said it
was full of errors."
"That sure sounds like 'another Jesus' to
me."
She fell into thought. Then her eyes
darkened with renewed
suspicion, and I realized that her mood was
swinging back. "Wait a
minute," she demanded. "I said Christianity is
just another cult.
You haven't denied that. We're merely talking
about what kind of
cult it is."
"You mean that I've only shown you that
Christianity is a more
biblical cult than The Group was."
"If you understand me, then what's your
answer?"
I meditated. "Some theologians do use the
word 'cult' to mean
'religion.' I certainly don't deny that Christianity
is a religion.
Is it just the fact that it's a religion that bothers
you?"
"No, I don't have a problem with that."
"Other people use the word to mean not any
religion, but an
abusive, manipulative religion like The Group.
Did you find Sarah
and the Christians you got to know through
her abusive and
manipulative?"
"Well, no."
"Still other people use the word 'cult' for a
false religion.
The Group's beliefs are certainly contrary to
the Gospel. The
question, then, is whether you now think the
Gospel itself is false."
"I can't say for sure that it's false. It's just that
at this
point I find it pretty hard to believe that it's true."
"But why?"
Prisca flashed again. "Because I've been
burned! What else
have we been talking about? Isn't it obvious?"
"Why should that make a difference?"
She was dumfounded. "You must be crazy to
ask me that. How
could it not make a difference?"
I smiled a little. "I'm not unsympathetic,
Prisca. I know
that you suffered in The Group. But I'm a
teacher. I try to rely
on logic. How one feels about a line of
reasoning doesn't determine
whether the conclusion of the reasoning is
true."
"I don't understand you at all."
"It's like this. Before getting mixed up with
The Group, you
heard the Gospel from Sarah and accepted it
as true. When she first
explained it, didn't you have any objections?"
"Of course I did. I didn't like hearing that I had
a sin
problem and needed a Savior."
"Did she reply by telling you to accept the
Gospel anyway because
it would make you feel good?"
"That would have been stupid. Besides, I
just told you that
my first feelings about the Gospel were bad."
"How did she really reply to your objections?"
"She answered them by giving me reasons
to believe that what
she said was true."
"Just as I would have expected her to. So at
what point in
these conversations did you accept the
Gospel?"
"When I was — No. Not when I was
convinced. When I was
convinced, and also willing to admit that I was
convinced."
"Now listen carefully. Sarah gave you
reasons to believe.
Since that time, have you found any better
reasons not to
believe?"
"It just seems made-up to me now."
"What do you mean, 'seems'?"
"I mean that after what I've been through, it
feels unreal.
That's pretty clear, isn't it?"
"Yes, but listen to what you just said. It
feels unreal.
That's an expression of a feeling, not of a
reason."
"I suppose so."
"So I put the question to you again. Since
hearing the Gospel
from Sarah, have you found better
reasons to disbelieve it than
the reasons she gave you to believe?"
She hesitated. "I would have said so at the
time I joined The
Group. But my main motive was the desire to
belong. It's not as
though I reconsidered Sarah's reasoning and
saw through it."
"Then aren't the reasons Sarah offered you
for believing the
Gospel just as strong as they ever were?"
"I guess — Now that you put it — I never
thought —" Prisca
trailed off into an agitated silence. But that
wasn't the end, for
on her face I saw the slow dark signs of yet
another change. She
gathered up her energies.
"The heck I don't have a better reason
for disbelief!" she
exclaimed. "I'll tell you my better reason!
If Jesus is so
strong, so wise, so full of love that he knows
when the sparrow
falls, then why didn't He care enough to
stop me?"
We had reached the crux of the matter — you
might say the
Cross of it. It was so unfair, I thought. She was
blaming Christ
that she had abandoned Him, instead of
accepting the forgiveness
that He had won for her with His blood.
Instead of thanking Him for
bearing her guilt, she was calling it His and
making Him bear it.
It wasn't so much her unfairness that bore me
down, as God's. I had
talked and talked, yet we were back where we
had started. Why did
He make it so hard?
So unfair. Job had thought so too. "Where
were you when I
laid the foundations of the earth?" I murmured.
It was God's answer
to Job when he demanded the reason for his
sufferings.
"What are you saying?" she demanded. "I
can't make out your
words."
God's answer had been enough for Job. It
might have been for
Prisca. Then again, God had answered Job
from out of the whirlwind.
No whirlwind here. Just me. So unfair.
For a moment I resented Him almost as
much as she did, because
He wasn't present to help. Then I caught
myself and repented, and
in that moment I knew exactly in what manner
He was present.
"He did stop you," I said.
"What?" she asked, face flushed. "What are
you talking
about?"
"I said He did stop you. It took Him longer
because you
pushed Him away. Didn't he send Sarah to
you? And then, through
her, to me? And then, through me, to your
parents?"
There was something in her face I couldn't
identify. Anger
was still there, but it wasn't anger.
"Who do you think was doing all those
things, Prisca? It
wasn't Sarah. It wasn't me. It wasn't your
parents. He did stop
you. He is stopping you even now. That is the
measure of His
love."
Silence, then a wracking sound. At first I
thought it was rage,
then I recognized it for a sob. Just then Sarah
appeared at the
door, eyes round as saucers as they took in
the scene.
In minutes they were gone. They had done
those things God has
gifted young women to do; Sarah, of course,
began crying before she
even knew why Prisca was. I believe there
was a great quantity of
hugging.
Slowly my breath steadied. I read a
psalm.
If you have questions you’d like to Ask
Theo,
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