Differences? What differences?
I bet you didn't think I could even count to 15. I'm not trying to brag, but you need to know that I graduated in the top 75 percent of my high school class. In fact, throughout my entire education, I have done well in every single subject that didn't have anything to do with words or numbers. I'm telling you, you're dealing with a being of superior intelligence here. I'm also seeing how my academic accomplishments have impacted my character. Thus, my next article may well be entitled, "Humility — And How I Attained It." Stay tuned!
My facetious (but almost true!) opening paragraph demonstrates one of the differences between guys and girls I've noticed over the years. Many of us guys sometimes think it is a little uncool to study hard and make good grades, but all the while we try to impress others as to just how brilliant we truly are. On the other hand, most of the girls I've known seem to attend class faithfully, complete assignments, and pursue excellence in their studies. But they also feel no compulsion to flaunt their grade point average to us slackers! While they're walking the walk, us guys are just talking the talk.
I know there are multitudes of exceptions, even in the area of studies, but I want to spend a few minutes with you to explore the serious (and some not-so-serious) differences between guys and girls, men and women, gentlemen and ladies — plug in whatever titles are most politically correct in your city!
Knowing you (as my adoring readers) are accustomed to my high standards of careful research, I pecked out the phrase "differences between men and women" in my Google search engine and came up with about 101,000,000 responses. Now, I can't say I looked them all up, but there are some fascinating sites you might want to explore. Amazon.com offers a book, written by a woman and her husband, entitled Why Men Don't Iron: The Fascinating and Unalterable Differences Between Men and Women. I scrolled down to glance at the readers' reviews, only to find a young man who resented the title, declaring his ironing proficiencies and announcing he was writing a book entitled, Why All Women Authors Are Stupid!
After reading that rather immature version of the battle of the sexes, I find it hard to believe anyone might be of the crowd that thinks there are absolutely no differences between guys and girls, except maybe a happen-chance switching of a chromosome or two. Well, read on, and tell me if you don't see a myriad of distinctions between guys and girls that goes way beyond "environmental molding" and supports the concept that we do have a Creator that purposely made male and female mentally, physically, psychologically, even spiritually diverse.
Don't give me credit for this list, though. There are hundreds of these so-called "differences" floating around on the Internet with no indication of their original sources. Copy and paste any of them into your favorite search engine and see what I mean. Well, enough disclaimers. Enjoy!
- Even though a guy has 50 percent more brute strength than a girl, she is able to withstand higher temperatures than he can.
- A girl has a larger stomach, kidneys, liver and appendix than a guy, but she has smaller lungs, thus giving her less breathing capacity than a guy.
- The right hemisphere of guys' brains are better developed; therefore, they are more visual, mathematic, exploring, more sex oriented, and commit most violent crime. Girls, though, have the left hemisphere more developed and are therefore more verbal, communicative, sensitive, and more prone to phobias and depression.
- Guys use restrooms solely for biological reasons — to drain their bladder. Girls, on the other hand, use restrooms as social lounges. Guys will never speak a word or make eye contact with others they don't know there. But girls who've never even met will, by the time they're finished, leave laughing out loud together like old friends.
- When the restaurant check comes, each of the guys will throw big bills out on the table to supposedly pay for the tab. When the check comes for the girls, each will get out her calculator to verify the total and figure her down-to-the-penny part.
- All week, a girl will thoughtfully make an extensive list of things to purchase at the store, and when she arrives, she walks directly from item to item, comparing prices and coupons. When the frig is empty and starting to grow things, a guy will just show up at the closest store and start cruising up and down every aisle, throwing in his basket anything that looks appealing. Even though his cart is jam-packed, he will try to butt in the 10 items-or-less checkout line.
- A guy has five items in his bathroom — a razor, shaving cream, a bar of soap, a toothbrush, and towel from Holiday Inn. The average number of items in a typical girl's bathroom is reported to be as high as 437, the majority of which a guy couldn't even tell what they are or used for.
- When a girl says she will be ready in five minutes, she's using the same meaning of time as when a guy says the football game has just five minutes left to play. Neither the guy nor the girl is counting time-outs, commercials or replays!
- A girl believes that visitors will be impressed by a clean house. A guy believes the visitors will be impressed by his large stereo.
- Guys don't decorate their handwriting; they just chicken-scratch. Girls will pull out their scented, color-coordinated stationary and use ridiculously large circles, hearts and loops to finish off their "i's", "p's" and "g's." It is a real hassle to read a letter from a girl. Even when she is dumping a guy, she'll finish it off with a smiley face at the end.
- If a girl is out driving and she finds herself in unfamiliar surroundings, she will stop at a gas station and ask for directions. Guys, of course, consider this to be a sign of weakness. A guy will never stop and ask for directions. They will drive in a circle for hours, all the while saying things like, "Looks like I've found a new way to get there," and, "I know I'm in the neighborhood. I recognize that Ace hardware store."
- With the exception of female bodybuilders who call each other names like "Ultimate Pecs" and "Big Turk," women disdain the use of nicknames. If Amber, Suzanne, Katherine and Natalie get together for lunch, they will call each other Amber, Suzanne, Katherine and Natalie. But if Mike, Dave, Rob, and Aaron go out on the town, they will affectionately refer to each other as Bullet-Head, Godzilla, Peanut-Brain and Yard-Dart.
- A girl worries about the future until she gets a husband, while a guy never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
- A girl marries a guy expecting him to change, but he usually doesn't. A guy marries a girl thinking she will always be the same — and, of course, she isn't.
- Girls love cats. Guys say they love cats, but when girls aren't looking, they kick cats.
I could have been much more scientific and brought in the big guns like neurologist Dr. Richard Restak from Georgetown School of Medicine or psychologist Dr. Michael Conner from Oregon to prove to you that men and women differ in every cell of their beings. My approach, though, was to appeal to your funny bone and hope that it would somehow seep up into your brain!
Our conclusion? Guys and girls are different. And that's good.
Genesis 2 is where it all began.
"Then the Lord God formed man of dust from the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being" (Genesis 2:7).
"Then the Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him'" (Genesis 2:18).
"The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man" (Genesis 2:22).
God designed the two genders to complete each other, not to compete with each other. They are definitely equal, but certainly different — in almost every area of life. Just for fun, I would like to throw in one final "bonus list" to help you identify whether you are currently a "competer" or a "completer" in how you relate to the opposite sex. Are you:
- An Eliminator: these people deny there are any differences at all. They will demand and manipulate the other gender to see things their way.
- An Accommodator: deep down, these people know there are differences, but choose to ignore them. They are in denial and seek to avoid understanding the opposite sex at every turn.
- An Appreciator: these people are beginning to see the diversity as necessary to healthy relationships, realizing that God uses the differences to mature and grow them.
- A Celebrator: these people have embraced the differences and actually enjoy them. They see how they can fit in and complement the other gender. They view the sharp contrasts of mind, will and emotion as plusses, not minuses.
In which of these four categories would you currently place yourself? Wherever you are on the spectrum, keep moving downward, would you? If you will give up your independence and determine to be a team player, you can move from an "eliminator" to a "celebrator." I promise it will aid you in becoming a wise, balanced guy or girl that is in for one rare, but fulfilling, marriage some day.
Copyright 2003 Steve Shadrach. All rights reserved.