Notice: All forms on this website are temporarily down for maintenance. You will not be able to complete a form to request information or a resource. We apologize for any inconvenience and will reactivate the forms as soon as possible.

Interracial Dating, Part 2

interracial dating couple
Some people use the Bible to say that people of different races should not intermarry. Let's take a close look at the passages people use to say that we should remain separate but equal.

PART 1: Interracial Dating »

As troublesome as it is to know that some people are either vehemently opposed to interracial relationships, or just plain scared of them, there is something about this issue that bothers me even more. It would be one thing if racism was only fooling nonbelievers. Unfortunately, Bible-believing Christians seem to be influenced as well.

When I was a senior in high school, I had a white friend named Kate who was good friends with a black guy named Anton in our youth group. Since it is very difficult for boys and girls to remain “really good friends,” they began to like one another. Anton was an awesome guy. He was a leader at our youth group, he was sweet to his family, and most importantly he loved the Lord with all of his heart. He was constantly coming up with Bible study topics at youth group, and he introduced quite a few of his football teammates to Jesus. However, Kate’s parents didn’t see any of that. All they saw was his chocolate-colored skin.

“You don’t want to get involved in an interracial relationship,” they told Kate. “It will be too difficult and painful.”

“What if you get married and have kids?” they questioned. “They will face discrimination from others. They will never fit in. You’ll be creating a whole new race that no one else is a part of.”

“It’s just not OK. There will be too many cultural differences. You’ll have to answer too many questions. It won’t be a good situation.”

Family Fears

I sat with Kate for many evenings as she cried about the situation. Although I hugged and comforted her, I honestly think that I may have been hurting more than she was. Before Kate’s well-meaning parents had such a problem with Anton, I had never once faced any type of discrimination due to being bi-racial. In fact, I loved that my parents were two different races. I had experienced both of their worlds, and I had a broader perspective than many people do. I told Kate that her parents were assuming things; that I had never been ostracized due to my interracial background. Here were Kate’s parents, telling her about all these difficulties her hypothetical children would face, when I had never dealt with one single problem.

If Anton had been white, Kate’s parents most likely would have loved the idea of them dating. But he wasn’t, so they chose not to. Fortunately, since Kate’s parents were Christians, they prayed about the issue. They fought with God about it, and eventually they gave into Him. They finally did come to terms with the idea of her dark-skinned boyfriend.

Here’s the thing: Kate’s parents would never consider themselves racist. They have never had anything against people of other races. They often welcomed me and other non-white people into their home. They are loving Christians who truly want to follow the Lord. However, they seemed to be in favor of keeping races somewhat separate, if only for the sake of an easier life. So when the race issue hit close to home, their true feelings on the subject were exposed.

Separate But Equal?

Are you a racist if you believe that people with certain skin tones are superior to others? Yes.

Are you a racist if you believe that all of the races are equal but should remain separate? Yes.

Usually when we think of racism, thoughts of slavery, anti-Semitism and the abuse of American Indians come to mind. However, there is just as much of a racist attitude involved with people who believe that, while there is no superiority involved in the races, they should not intermingle. Thankfully, our country officially rejected this philosophy when it abolished the Jim Crow laws in the South. However some people, including Christians, maintain this attitude.

Some Christians have outwardly promoted banning interracial dating on the basis that God’s plan calls for races to be kept separate.

Let’s dissect the argument behind the “separate but equal” reasoning. Some Christians have argued that God created separate races and placed them in different areas for his own purposes. OK, I can’t argue with the fact that different ethnicities come from different areas of the world.

Next, we’re reminded of the Tower of Babel in the Bible. According to some “separate but equal” advocates, it is a glaring example of God’s disapproval of racial unity. God condemned Babel, which is why he confused their language and scattered them throughout the earth. Therefore, interracial marriage is just one component of the devil’s conspiracy to bring about a utopian one-world government which functions without the need for God — people who marry interracially are trying to bring about the modern-day Babel, the antichrist and anything else evil. Yeah, umm, this is where I’m going to have to disagree. Right about here is where we have to make sure we’re not inferring imaginary meaning from biblical passages.

¿Separaciòn de Color o Idioma?

So let’s begin. First of all, I’m pretty sure the Tower of Babel had nothing to do with interracial marriage. It seems as though God was concerned with man becoming too confident in his own ability, which is why He thwarted their tall plans. (Pun very much intended. And I apologize.)

Second, marrying someone with a different skin color than yours has nothing to do with promoting a one-world government. As a proponent of interracial marriage, I do not support the uniting of all countries, the antichrist or the mark of the beast. I do support abandoning discrimination based on melanin.

Third, according to the philosophy that God has created the races with barriers that aren’t to be broken down, anyone who is an American is technically in direct violation of God’s will. It is becoming very difficult to find someone in this country who is 100 percent anything. Anyone ever heard America called a melting pot? Besides, color had nothing to do with Babel; it was all about separation based on language.

So if your grandma was French and your grandpa was Irish, they better watch out for lightning bolts from heaven. If your major is Spanish or German, you have crossed over our God-given language barriers. I hope you didn’t study abroad. Perhaps you should never see a foreign film, or for that matter, visit a different state where different idioms are used. You probably should just never leave your room again. You wouldn’t want to cross over any barriers.

If we do continue to disobey God and decide to stay in this country, we better go back to the old days when blacks and whites went to different schools, American Indians were kept on reservations and Japanese people lived in internment camps. There was a guy in Germany who thought separation was a good idea, too. He made certain people wear bright yellow stars and live in separate areas so that no one would get confused and accidentally associate with them.

I think a “separate but equal” philosophy based on skin color is just as dangerous as outright racism. It is elitist, discriminatory and there is no justification for it.

PART 3: Interracial Dating »

Copyright 2012 Focus on the Family. All rights reserved.

Share This Post:

About the Author

Denise Morris Snyder

Denise Morris Snyder is a mom, wife and part-time discipleship pastor at CrossRoads Church in Red Deer, Alberta, Canada. She previously worked as an editor for Focus on the Family and a writer for David C Cook. She has her Master’s in Old Testament Biblical Studies from Denver Seminary.

Related Content