What can I do to meet more men?

Question

I’m a 32-year-old female, and I desire to be married. I believe it is God’s will for me to be married. The problem is that at the moment I am not in a relationship. I go to a small church, and there are no eligible guys. Actually all the guys are much younger than me. At the moment some of my friends insist that I need to go to places where men will know I am available; they suggest joining an online dating service, changing my church. I am frustrated because there is so much pressure on me to go look for a man, but I am not sure that I should be doing this.

Isn’t the man supposed to pursue the woman? I want to continue to live a life that is pleasing before God. I pray a lot to be married one day, but at the moment I feel pressured to do things that I’m not comfortable with. The circle of people I interact with does not include a lot of guys in their 30s. What are your suggestions?

Answer

Several ideas come to mind:

For starters, don’t do anything you’re uncomfortable with, even if your friends say you should. You need to follow your conscience on this.

Second, keep in mind that there’s a key difference between pursuing a man and doing things that make it more likely you’ll meet eligible men. I suggest reading these two past articles for some ideas: “Finding a Husband” and “Other than the bar scene, where can young adults go to meet people?

Next, consider the value of mentors. Telling an older married couple(s) you know and trust that you desire marriage is a great starting point. They can pray with you and keep their eyes open for eligible men to introduce you to. They can also provide valuable protection and guidance when a man does appear on the scene.

Finally, pray boldly. I’ve written about that, too: “Pray Boldly.”

May God grant you wisdom and the desires of your heart.

Blessings,

CANDICE WATTERS

Copyright 2006 Candice Watters. All rights reserved.

About the Author

Candice Watters

Candice Watters is a wife, mom, and Bible teacher. She is the author of Get Married: What Women Can Do to Help it Happen, co-founder with her husband, Steve, of Boundless.org and co-author of Start Your Family: Inspiration for Having Babies. They have four children and blog at FamilyMaking.com.