I started writing for Boundless in 2004 when I worked at Focus on the Family as an editor for the children’s magazines. Oddly enough, my first article was about surviving Christmas without a Lord of the Rings movie in the theater. The previous three years, going to the theater with my family to see the latest LOTR installment had been a treasured part of my Christmas festivities. Among other ideas, my article suggested reading the books, having an at-home movie marathon, and seeking out new opportunities for family bonding.
I emailed my article to Boundless editor Candice Watters, who told me she also had fond memories of going to movies with her family at Christmastime. She accepted the article to publish the next day! In the early days of Boundless — before the blog — Boundless published an original article every weekday. I wrote several more articles for Candice during her stint as editor. On one occasion she asked me for some revisions on a piece, and when I returned the article, she said, “Your revisions were elegant and efficient.” Since I worked as an editor, Candice was my first editor as an adult, and I learned a lot from her.
Closing the single-married gap
I continued writing articles for Boundless several times per year and eventually worked up to writing an article every month. A few of my early articles that received the most feedback (or created the most controversy) were:
Quarantining a Generation (2005)
Not Your Buddy (2006)
Trusting God with Relationships, Part 1 and Part 2 (2009 on the blog)
I was a single woman in her 20s, trying to make sense of life and relationships through the filter of a committed walk with Jesus. Boundless shared my vision. At times, my singleness was a source of frustration. I wanted to be married and have a family, so I wrote often about trusting God when life doesn’t go as planned. I also had a heart for singles to find their place in the church and discover life-giving community apart from their relationship statuses.
I often received notes from readers in those days (and even a few gifts). I commonly heard that my articles were relatable — as if I had been spying on my readers’ lives or could see their inner thoughts. I even heard of singles groups getting together to discuss my articles. I loved speaking into this space, and I felt Boundless readers were “my people” because I was a reader as well as a writer.
In 2008, I wrote an article titled “Vessel of Honor.” The subhead read: “How I serve God in the world has more to do with my heart than my marital status.” “Vessel of Honor” was my line in the sand of who I wanted to be as a single woman.
“There have been times when I have felt dissatisfied with my current position in life. Sometimes I wonder if God is really ordering my steps. I think singles must feel more acutely than most that we are “aliens and strangers” in this world (1 Peter 2:11). The thing is all people long for something more because this earth is not our true home.
“And so the gap between single and married is not so wide after all. All of us wait eagerly for our ultimate union with our heavenly Bridegroom. And as we live faithfully — single and married — our very lives proclaim Christ to the world.”
At the time I wrote the article, I had already met my now-husband, Kevin, but we were only acquaintances. In the article, I mentioned my ride with Tony the shuttle driver. He prayed that I would meet someone who shared my passion for children’s ministry. At the time, I had no idea that the man I’d met, who wanted to be a children’s pastor, was my future husband.
From Hadley to Gosselin
My relationship with Kevin came along when I was simply living my life. He asked me to lead a young adult small group with him at our church, and we quickly discovered that despite our age difference, God was drawing us together. In early 2009, we began officially dating. We got engaged in June and married in September. It was truly amazing how quickly God brought us together, which I wrote about in “A Year to Love.”
The Boundless team (and even Lisa Anderson, who was not yet on the Boundless team) attended my wedding and rejoiced with me. In a blog post about the day, I wrote:
“Before I was married, and particularly when no guy was in the picture, I wondered if I would feel drastically different once my husband came on the scene and especially once I was married. But the transition was surprisingly fluid. My wedding day was much like the rest of my life. Yes, it was a huge celebration of what God had done and the gift He had given, but it was also clearly a new position from which I (and Kevin) could glorify Him. Our very marriage shouted loud and clear about the kind of God we serve — One who is generous, loving and creative.”
In many ways, my 19 years of writing for Boundless have been an education in living life for Christ in all seasons — on mountaintops and through valleys. As I received the wisdom of other writers and dispensed the knowledge God was giving me, I found belonging and hope I desperately needed.
The world proposes many solutions for singles issues like loneliness and isolation, but apart from obedience to the Lord, these worldly answers fall short and often make matters worse. As I have stayed engaged with the Boundless community through the years, I have found that doing things God’s way, though difficult at times, is always worth it. And following Him is meant to be done in community.
Copyright 2023 Suzanne Hadley Gosselin. All rights reserved.
