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Rejected yet Abounding in Love

One of the challenging aspects of Christian dating is when

things don’t work out the way we had hoped. Both men and women can quickly slip

into excitement and anticipation over a budding, new relationship. But then, it

seems, an incalculable number of things can come along and sabotage the whole

thing. Dating can be frustrating and sometimes feels like building a house of

cards on a windy day.

Truth be told, getting to know someone and starting to date

is risky business. The more we spend time with someone, the more we will naturally

and increasingly trust them with our heart, our emotions, our happiness, etc.

And it’s natural for there to be pain and frustration when things don’t work

out. Maybe you’ve felt the desire to avoid, ignore, badmouth and even physically

hurt someone you once thought a forever friend. Those feelings often seem

justifiable in the moment, but — for Christians — reveal a shortsighted, parochial perspective.

The body of Christ should never succumb to such temptations,

because our hope and happiness does not rest solely on what happens in this

life, but what awaits us in the next. Several times in the New Testament, a

young, persecuted church was taught to rest their hopes and dreams in the joys

and happiness of heaven.

The Bible describes heaven as a wonderful place where all those

who are saved by the blood of Christ will live together forever. Too often we

forget that every Christian will live together in a perfect, loving community with

God, where every person will overflow with deep, sincere love for every other

person. It is a staggering thought.

Jonathan Edwards once described heaven this way:

There this glorious God is manifested, and

shines forth, in full glory, in beams of love. And there this glorious fountain

forever flows forth in steams, yea, in rivers of love and delight, and these

rivers swell as it were, to an ocean of love, in which the souls of the

ransomed may bathe with the sweetest enjoyment, and their hearts, as it were,

be deluged with love!

But in heaven, all shall have as

much love as they desire, and as great manifestations of love as they can bare

. . . Such will be the sweet and perfect harmony among the heavenly saints, and

such the perfect love reigning in every heart toward every other, without limit

or alloy, or interruption.

I love this description of heaven. Edwards looked at

passages like 1 Corinthians 13 and envisioned a heaven where God’s love will

flow like rivers of joy, drawing our own hearts to overflow with love for God

and each other. It’s hard to imagine what it will be like to live in a place

where everyone is full of love for you, where there is no secret

jealousy or malicious thoughts. Everyone in heaven will genuinely and deeply

love you, and you will love them. We will live as a family of loving

brothers and sisters forever.

It’s with this perspective we should grow in our love for our

brothers and sisters in Christ now. It’s not always easy, and I can think of

cases where people might push back. “What about this particular way I’ve been

hurt?” I hear you. This world is full of pain, and unfortunately, brothers and

sisters hurt each other here. But this world is temporary, and heaven is


So as we deal with frustrations and disappointments in dating, let’s remember that we will live together as the family of God forever. One day God will melt away all anger, hate,

bitterness, distrust and resentment. We will be satisfied in God’s love, and

love every brother and sister with a perfect love. Even today, we can begin to live out this heavenly reality. The Holy Spirit works to sanctify every believer’s heart and fill it with love for every brother and sister now. Let’s ask Him to give us

heavenly hearts as we wait for the day when we no longer need to read about the

joys of heaven, because they will be ours in abundance.

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About the Author

Andrew Hess

Andrew Hess is a Sr. Communications Specialist at Compassion International. He formally served as the director of content at the White Horse Inn and editor of His writing has also been featured on the Gospel Coalition. He lives in Colorado Springs with his wife Jen and their young son. Andrew and Jen met at the very first Boundless Pursuit conference at Focus on the Family in 2014.

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