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Let It Go

The title is misleading, but I’m not blogging about Frozen this week. I’m writing about letting things go and having a mentality that is helpful to have not only in life, but also in relationships. I’ve had to let a lot of things go over the last several weeks. The week or two before a wedding can get hectic, and not everything goes as planned.

The advice married women have been giving me for months is to accept that not everything will turn out how I envisioned, but let it go and enjoy the day. Tweet This Smile because no one will remember the smaller details. 

We’re into the week of the wedding, and I’m still having alterations made on my dress. The rental place called us with great news: They only had about 60 of the 115 chairs we’d originally selected. So we had to change the chair color from what I really wanted. Not to mention, the dining set we’d selected was no longer available a week ago, so we had to change that, too.

I’ve realized that I have to pick my battles. Will having black chairs instead of white ruin the wedding? Once I got over my initial frustration, the honest answer is, no, it won’t.

The past two weeks have been a learning process. I like having control, so it’s hard to let go. Last week it was driving me crazy that because we have an early wedding, I won’t be able to help set up the reception. I have this vision of what I want things to look like, but I have to trust others to do their best at replicating it. 

So many other things are out of my control — like the weather. I’ve been watching the forecast like a hawk. I can’t even tell you how many times a day I open the weather app on my phone, hoping it will cool down by a few degrees.

But I’m learning to go with the flow and accept that I can’t control everything. And the people around me are much happier when I do — especially my fiance, Josh. I felt bad for him when he was trying so hard to make the chair situation work to give me what I wanted. It caused so much stress for both of us that when I finally bent a little and let it go, it went so much better.

Letting it go is really just a compromise. It’s learning to compromise while keeping the true meaning of things in mind. For me this week, it’s reminding myself that the little details don’t matter that much. The point is the vows during the wedding ceremony and the marriage itself.

Letting it go works for a lot of different things. It’s learning to pick our battles and let the smaller things go, and the reward is peace of mind and harmony in our relationships. Someone leaving their dirty socks all over the floor shouldn’t strain a relationship, for example. If someone pulls out in front of you while driving, it shouldn’t ruin your day and cause you to have road rage.

Josh always tells me frustration comes from having unmet expectations, but when we don’t place such a high importance on the way we feel things are supposed to be rather than how they actually are, we tend to enjoy life a little more. Tweet This

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About the Author

Amy Kessler

Amy Kessler interned with the Boundless team in 2011 and is a journalism graduate from Biola University with a minor in biblical studies. She has experience in newspapers, magazines, blogging, social media and online content management. Amy lives in California where she works as a marketing assistant for a community college district and blogs about her spiritual life. She enjoys playing tennis, experimenting with HTML, and discussing marriage and relationships.

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