As my husband and son waited in line for the teacup ride, I plopped onto a nearby bench to take a drink of water. Two girls in their early 20s walked by and did a double take as they looked at the space beside me.
Turning my head to investigate, I saw what they had noticed: On the far end of the bench was a guy about their age with a mess of curly dark hair.
The girls nudged each other and slowly walked closer to the young man. I took another drink to hide my smile, fully invested in watching this meet-cute happen.
But instead of a rom-com-worthy moment, what happened next was a little sad. Instead of noticing these adorable girls, the boy with curly hair kept his head down, eyes fixed on the glowing screen of his phone. I felt an urge to call out: “Hello?! Look up! Your future wife could be standing in front of you!”
But the boy remained unaware and unmoved. The girls shrugged at each other. As I watched them turn to walk away, I wondered: How many people have missed opportunities to meet a future spouse — or even just a good friend — because they were too absorbed in their phone?
One of those people could have easily been me.
The night I met my husband, I tagged along with a friend whose mission was to buy a Golden Retriever from a private dog breeder. Awkwardly following my friend into the house, I quickly sat down on a couch and reached for my phone. To my dismay, I had left it on the seat of my friend’s Jeep.
With nothing to distract me, I had no choice but to sit and watch my friend play with puppies. The dog owner began talking to me. She introduced me to her family — including her son — and I married him less than two years later.
Of course, God is sovereign and does as He pleases regardless of who is staring at their phone. But I do wonder: Had I been absorbed in my phone that night, would I have missed meeting my future husband?
Reflecting on this has prompted me to start dropping my phone into my purse in social settings. I’ve noticed that choosing to engage instead of scroll unlocks countless opportunities for connection, no matter where I am:
- At church when I’m waiting for the service to start, I could just scroll Facebook or Instagram. But if I put my phone away, I’ll notice the visiting couple who looks lost and needs direction, or the elderly person with a smile looking for someone to talk to.
- In the doctor’s waiting room, I could click the email app on my phone and refresh it. Or I could turn my phone off and silently pray for those around me, especially for the family a few seats over who looks very concerned. I could offer a small smile to the woman next to me and tell her that her pink pants are cute.
- At a party when the conversation lulls, I could get out my phone and check a group text thread. Or I could leave my phone in my bag and instead ask a friend if they want to step outside with me to get some fresh air and talk about how they are really doing.
If you are hoping to meet your future spouse — or simply new friends — be intentional about putting your phone away. Checking notifications rarely changes anyone’s life. But if you look up, you just might meet someone who will.
Copyright 2025 Kathryn Andersen. All rights reserved.
